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Radical Forgiveness
by
Colin Tipping, M.Ed
Notwithstanding our need to have revenge and restitution whenever we
perceive ourselves to be victimized, the power and importance of forgiveness is
central to every religion. It has even entered the annals of psychology and is
now seen as essential to mental health. In the world of recovery and 12 step
programs the forgiveness step is considered to be the most
transformational. We also know that forgiveness is a highly effective adjunct
treatment for cancer and other immune deficiency diseases and that lack of
forgiveness is a reliable predictor of who is most likely to get cancer.
Yet forgiveness always seems so difficult – almost super-human. We know we
should forgive, but somehow we simply can’t do it. We consider people who
forgive as verging on sainthood. Why is this? What makes it so arduous? Why do
we find it so hard to let go of toxic emotional baggage?
The answer lies in our powerful attachment to the victim archetype. We have
lived out of this archetype for eons. It pervades our mass consciousness
at every level and we have come to believe that victim consciousness is
absolutely fundamental to the human condition. Jesus was the embodiment of
forgiveness, yet we have even made him a victim – the ultimate victim in fact.
We will not give it up. Why?
Because
the victim, archetype is sustained by the Ego, that wholly false belief system
that holds that we are separated from God and that God is angry with us and will
one day punish us.
Yet, herein lies the clue to why, deep down, we feel that forgiveness is the key
to our salvation. As we recognize that we are spiritual beings having a human
experience, we realize that we are NOT separate from God after all. We never
have been. It was simply a dream. We are all here expressing the ever expanding
consciousness of God. This is what’s driving this ‘campaign’ for forgiveness as
we approach the next millennium. Deep down we know it is the key to our
spiritual evolution.
What follows from this is even more interesting. Gregg Braden, in his book,
Walking Between the Worlds, shows that underlying all our problems,
anxieties, neuroses, unhappiness and loneliness, are just three basis fears:
(a) fear of
abandonment.
(b) fear of not being enough.
(c) fear of trusting.
These all come from our core belief that we are separate from God and that He is
angry with us and will punish us severely one day. They play out in a myriad of
ways – child abuse, spousal abuse, addictive behavior, family dysfunction,
relationship problems, and so on – but the core issues underlying all these
things are the same: those three basic fears. As we let go of our belief
in separation, we see that these fears have no foundation whatsoever.
But how to let go? Ordinary forgiveness won’t help us because it is firmly tied
to the victim archetype. “Letting bygones be bygones,” means I will let you off
the hook, but I still believe you did something to me. I am still a victim. No,
to break free we must do better than that. We must replace ordinary forgiveness
with something so compelling and spiritually liberating that it magnetizes us
away from our commitment to the victim consciousness. That something is Radical
Forgiveness.
Radical Forgiveness literally obliterates the belief in separation. It takes us
beyond the drama and the illusion of the many ‘stories’ we create around the
three basic fears and enables us to see the truth that we have NEVER been
abandoned, we ARE enough right now and that it is SAFE to surrender to Spirit.
When we awaken to that truth, we are able to understand the true meaning of our
suffering and transform it immediately, thereby releasing the victim archetype.
When we recognize that everything that happens is simply an outplaying of our
three basic fears and that we needed the experience in order to heal those
fears, our life changes immediately. We understand then that, because we chose
it, there is nothing to forgive. We are no longer victims. We can then live our
life knowing that, without exception, everything that happens to us is divinely
guided, entirely purposeful, and for our spiritual growth. That is the
essence of Radical Forgiveness.
That doesn’t mean we won’t often slip back into victim consciousness. We will.
As soon as someone or something upsets us, we will almost certainly revert back.
And that’s OK. That’s what being human is actually about. But we won’t need to
hang out in victim consciousness for very long. A day or two perhaps, a
week maybe – but not years or lifetimes – which has been the norm until now!
I have created a new therapy based on this approach. Instead of asking what is
wrong with this person and how can I fix her, which is the question that
traditional psychotherapy asks, Radical Forgiveness Therapy asks, “What is
PERFECT about what is occurring for this person, and how can I get her to shift
her awareness so she might be willing to see this perfection?”
This makes Radical Forgiveness Therapy more a form of education than a therapy
in the traditional sense, for it seeks not to change but to enlighten the
person. The spiritual shift in perception that occurs as a result of what really
is a therapy for the soul allows the energy around a situation to become unstuck
and to flow in the direction of healing. As a result, and paradoxically,
everything changes and what previously seemed to be a problem quickly dissolves.
It is very quick and does not require digging up old emotional pain as does
psychotherapy. By working with and reframing what is happening now and forgiving
those people who are currently pushing our buttons, we heal everything in the
past that is represented by the current situation. This truly is present-time
energy medicine for the soul.
In the months and years ahead, especially after Y2K and other disturbances have
occurred, there will be a great need for people with a Radical Forgiveness
approach who can help others see the spiritual big picture and understand life
from that level.
My mission is to raise the consciousness of the planet through Radical
Forgiveness and I am committed to sharing this work with as many people as
possible so that we can all remember who we are, raise our vibration and go
home.
Radical
Forgiveness Website
The Radical Forgiveness Experience
Radical Forgiveness: Colin Tipping
If you would care to express your desire for a world of
forgiveness, and for racial reconciliation in America, visit
Radicalforgiveness.org and read the 'Spiritual Petition.' Then add your name to
the petition. Thanks!
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